Can You Stand Up to Your Fears?

This Thanksgiving my parents, boyfriend, and I all went to Disney World. Best vacation ever. But I never thought I would do some of the things I did. One of my biggest fears is falls. Falls on all sorts of rides, water, car, roller coaster. On Thursday we all got to Magic Kingdom. I enjoy all those classic rides like The Haunted Mansion, Buzzz, and Pirates (not to brag or anything but I almost got 999,999 on the Buzzz ride, oh yeah). However, my boyfriend likes the other rides. The rides that terrify me. The Mountains (A.K.A. Splash, Thunder, and Space). Now I'm not sure if I wrote this in my advice blog but compromise is an important thing in a relationship, but if I were to tell you it's easy...well I'd be lying. He compromised with me and we came up with this. He'd go on all my childhood rides and skip Thunder and Space Mountain, and I would get all my rides and all I had to do was go on Splash Mountain. I agreed with this since water comforts me. When we walked by it, my anxiety kicked in. I suffer from really bad anxiety. I mean really bad. We got the FastPasses and then went to hang out until it was time to go on the ride. My mom went with us because she loves these kinds of rides and I guess it made me feel better. Waiting in line wasn't so bad since there were pictures of many woodland creatures and I felt a little better. Once I was on the ride the major anxiety kicked in. I was scared for my life. No matter how many times my boyfriend told me to calm down I couldn't. It was like I was in labor. I was telling him how much I hated him and how I can't believe I'm on the ride. This was the anxiety talking of course and he knows this, which is why he couldn't stop laughing. **Warning Splash Mountain Spoiler Ahead** All the drops within the ride itself (in the dark) were no big deal, but when I saw the light (I thought it was heaven, but it was really just the outside drop) I could not control my shaking. I couldn't even hold on to the bar to keep myself safe or anything and the entire drop I didn't even scream because I was in shock. Once the ride was over I almost couldn't get out of the boat. Thinking back, I wish I hadn't freaked out like I had because I didn't get to enjoy the ride and I've learned something from this. If your fears are stopping you from having fun then you just need to face them. I did and I definitely don't regret it. I hope that the next time you have to face your fear, as long as it isn't something truly dangerous, that you go for it; you may never get the chance again.

Because Disney is a prominent theme in this blog here is a Disney themed blonde joke:

 During her company's periodic password audit, a blond employee was found to be using this password:

GoofyHueyLouieDeweyDaisyDonaldMickeyMinniePhoenix

When she was asked why she had such a long password, she said, "The boss said that my password had to be at least eight characters long and have at least one capital." 

When You Were Young

When I was young I was attached to my mom. Everywhere she went, I went. Then she started working and to 3 year old me, that wasn't okay. So finally, when I got fed up with her leaving me everyday I decided to do something about it. I took her keys when she wasn't looking and hid them in my toy box. She spent the whole morning freaking out and looking back and forth, up and down the entire house to find her keys. Suddenly she stopped.
"Sarah, where are my keys?"
"I don't know."
Let's just say that I'm a really bad liar. She went into my room and looked through there too. I felt really bad at this point so I pointed to the toy box and told her they were in there. She asked me why I would take her keys. I told her the truth. I told her that I didn't understand why she didn't want to spend time with me anymore. Coming from a 3 year old, let's also just say that she didn't end up going to work that day and I was able to add a few more toys to my toy box ;).

Since a new year is a approaching I thought it would be appropriate for me to show you my to do list:

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels....."duh".....bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!

March - Got excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours.....power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of car in rain storm.....car swamped, because top was down.

September - The capital of California is "C".....isn't it???

October - Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days.....instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!

December - Couldn't call 9-11....."duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the phone!!!

P.S. Guess the song

Self-Consciousness

Nobody wants to feel self-conscious, but unfortunately it happens to everyone. If someone tells you it has never happened to them, well sorry but they’re lying. I will admit that it is pretty hard to embarrass me, but that doesn’t mean that every single moment I am okay with how I look or don’t feel bad about myself. Honestly, I wish I never feel like that, but it happens and I have to deal with it.

       I think the best way to deal with it is to not think about it. If you don’t think about it, then you’ll probably forget about it. But sometimes that doesn’t work and you’ll have to resort to plan B. Plan B usually involves several complicated actions that involve lots of make-up (if you’re a girl) and a strategically picked outfit, along with some very loving friends. Usually being around the people that make you happiest will give you the greatest amount of pleasure.

       I feel like people feel most self-conscious when they are around people that don’t know them or don’t care about them.

Let’s play Would You Rather really quick.

Would you rather…

A) Hang out with your friends, go to the movies or the beach?

OR

B) Be at school sitting in a class with a bunch of people you aren’t close with?

I can pretty much guess which you’re going to choose.

I think now is the appropriate time for a segue…

School.

This is where all the self-consciousness begins. School was made to be a place of learning but it has quickly turned into a place of judgment. How many times have you thought to yourself, “Man I look so bad today, I really hope no one notices”, and the whole day you feel like everyone is staring at you? I’ve had those days and you probably have also. But it all comes down to school. School is where you see your friends, some close friends and some friends that you have just to get through the day in one piece. There are also all the clichéd school people: the lunch lady, the bully, the class clown. But honestly, I don’t really think many people pay much attention to what they should be. Seeing people being made fun of isn’t supposed to make you laugh. If you’re laughing then you’re a follower, and that’s really sad. I don’t mean laughing at a friends joke about him/herself or a funny joke that someone told you. I mean laughing at the expense of someone else, someone who isn’t your friend. Having to see this everyday is not fun, especially if you are the butt of the jokes. But it also hurts when the person is your friend, or just an innocent bystander. Maybe it’s just me, maybe I’m just too sensitive when it comes to bullying, but in the end it still embarrasses me. At the beginning of this blog I said that it is pretty hard to embarrass me, but the one way that will work every time is if you stand there and embarrass someone else.

Here is your self-conscious blonde joke to lighten the mood a little bit (girls don’t be mad at me this one is for the boys) :

Three blondes were walking through the desert when they found a magic genie’s lamp.

After rubbing the lamp to make the genie appear, The Genie said, “I will grant three wishes, one for each of you.”

The first said, “I wish I were smarter.”

So, she became a redhead.

The second blonde said, “I wish I were smarter than she is.”

She became a brunette.

The third blond ordered, “I wish I were smarter than both of them!”

So, she became a man.

Love Advice

Going through life alone is something that no one wants to do. Lucky for me, I’ve already found someone and I’m going to help you find someone too.

1.   Never pretend you know something that you don’t

Numerous times I’ve seen people try to carry on a conversation with someone that they like, but not actually know what the person is talking about. If you actually use this technique, at some point the other person will notice or call you out on it, which is pretty awkward. You should learn some things about what the person likes so you can carry out a conversations, but if he/she says something you have never heard of (like a Belgium soccer team) don’t go along with it. Just ask; he/she will most likely be happy to explain it to you.

2.   State your opinion

No one wants to be agreed with all the time. That gets boring. Stating your opinion or arguing your side will show the other person that you have confidence and aren’t shallow.

3.   Don’t act like someone else

If you don’t act like yourself, at some point, he/she will notice and if he/she doesn’t like you for who you are then forget about him/her. They probably weren’t worth it anyway.

4.   Don’t try to become the other person

The reason this person wants to be with you is because they don’t want to be alone. If you’re acting just like them, it’s like having 2 of him/her and is just as boring as having one of him/her.

5.   Have SOMETHING in common

If you have nothing in common it is just as bad as having everything in common. Think about it, what would you talk about? Who would you hang out with on group dates? If you have nothing in common or any friends in common that you can bond over it’ll just lead to unnecessary awkwardness.

Since this entry was all about the Do’s and Don’ts of dating, instead of a blonde joke here are some very bad pick-up lines that should never be used ever:

1. Hi, my name is Justin… Justin Credible

2. What time do you have to be back in heaven?

3. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy

4. Remember me? Oh, that's right, I've met you only in my dreams.

5. My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in

Dancing in the Rain or Rain Dancing?

Dancing in the rain is something I always wanted to do as a little girl. Of course this never happened because my mother is a strong believer in the fact that rain will make you sick no matter what. Once I was old enough to make these decisions on my own, I decided it was time to dance. I waited until it was raining so hard outside you could hear barks and meows. Once I was out there I let it all out. All those years of built up frustration because I couldn't go out, was now being let out in this instant. I hate to say it, but my mom was right. I did get sick. Not for a day or two, but for a week. It wasn't fun. Let's just say that I won't be doing that again any time soon. 
Recently though it feels like I've been doing more rain dances, then actually wanting to dance in the rain. Don't think I don't like rain, I do. Especially with a good book and some hot chocolate. But every day, when I worked at Camp Pookie it seemed like me and my fellow counselors would dance for rain everyday. This is because of a much bigger problem.
Working at a camp and having to counsel a group of 24 girls (the biggest group in the ENTIRE camp might I add) is not exactly fun. Sure the first day their cute and you want to hug them and everything, but after a while they become characters, smart mouths, and completely crazy. That's what you get for letting your guard down around nine year olds. The most dreaded part of a camp counselor's day is pool time. A full hour at the pool where all you can achieve is a fabulous farmer's tan, with 24 children all trying to drown you because when you yell at them they think it's funny. So, everyday all the counselors would pray to the sky gods for some rain so that we wouldn't have to go to the pool. 
Of course, when you want something to happen it doesn't. That's Murphy's Law. That summer I went to the pool more times then you can say "I love getting presents" (which I do, just by the way) and it was horrible. Luckily for me, and not so luckily for others, my hair is straight, which means that it dries the exact same way it was before it got wet. People resented me for that, and so the blonde-straight hair jokes continue, but c'est la vi. 
Here is your Dancing in the Rain blonde joke:


  There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence.

Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. Then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde $50.00

The blonde put the $50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him $5.

Now, I don't really now how that was a blonde joke considering that that blonde was very clever. Almost as clever as I am. 

My Palm Fronds

Where I live is pretty much the stereotype of where blondes live. There are beaches and palm trees at every turn, even in the towns. It really is beautiful, so naturally it is home to some very beautiful people. My family and friends are here for me to have fun, laugh everyday, and make the most out of everything. My parents are not the old fashioned types where there are a thousand rules and you feel like you’re living in a bubble. They’re cool and the trust they have in me is incredible. I had to earn that trust though and I would never do anything to lose that.

Now my friends are a different story. There’s a crazy one, a wannabe funny one, and the one who acts as my support system. Though I’ve only listed three, that’s really all I need.

            Three. Not ten, not 300 (like on facebook), but three.

             Each of these people has their own personality traits, things I like and things I don’t. But no matter how much time I spend angry at them or annoyed with them they are still my friends. And throughout the rest of this blog, I will be talking about each of these people, whether it be good or bad, but as for right now here is your My Palm Fronds joke:

The assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!

Honestly….neither could I.   

Defining a Blonde

I’ve been a blonde my whole life. I’m not chemically altered or have a hair color that came in a box, I’m a real blonde. I spent my whole life listening to people ask me where I get my hair done, and no matter what I say they do not believe me. It’s kind of annoying. So I’ve decided to bring it upon myself to bring you closer into the life of a true blonde: how we feel, how we act, what we see, and how we react to all those blonde jokes.

            I’m not one to fall victim to a slew of blonde jokes and end up crying. So here’s your Defining a Blonde joke:

            A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor.

            The doctor asked her “What happened?”

She answered, “I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang, but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.”

“Oh Dear!” the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. “But what happened to your other ear?”

“The person called back.”

Pretty clever, huh?

Not really. I don’t really know any person who would really do that. But…I do understand why people frequently make fun of blondes. Maybe it’s all the fake blondes setting a bad rep for us real blondes. Don’t get me wrong there could be a few bad blonde eggs in the bunch. As far as I’m concerned I’m not one of them and I never want to be considered one of them. So, Blondes and Palm Fronds is here to disprove all those people who believe in the Blonde Misconception.